MONEY MAN
by
Kenyon Ledford


The superhero appeared in the nearly deserted subway station. His costume was a simple jogging outfit with a ski mask over his head. The ski mask was embroidered with a large dollar sign on the front. He surveyed the three victims, who, when they saw him, waved frantically.
“Money Man, over here!”
Money Man raised a fist. “Up, up, and away,” he cried. He ran to the victims at full speed, stopping too late and knocking down the lady in the group.
“I'm sorry, miss,” he said, helping her up.
“That's okay, Money Man,” she replied. “Harry, tell him what happened.”
Harry loosened his tie. “Joe, here, got his wallet lifted, and...hey, how come you didn't fly?”
Money Man put his hands on his hips. “Money man is frugal. Capes cost money.” He looked at Harry's waistline. “Maybe a little frugality wouldn't hurt you, either.
Harry blushed and began to stammer, but Joe interrupted.
“Look here, Money Man,” he said. “Some guy bumped into us. He apologized, and all, then asked for the time. But after he left we noticed my wallet was gone.”
“And my watch,” added Harry.
“Can't you do something, Money Man?” The lady pleaded.
Money Man patted his jogging suit. “I'm strapped 'till payday...”
“We mean find the thief,” Joe growled.
“Oh, right, of course.” Money Man raised his fist. “Up, up, and away!” He ran off.
“There goes a Hell of a guy,” Harry said.
“He's a bit off, if you ask me,” muttered Joe.
“Hey,” the lady said. “My purse is gone!”